Love Yourself and be compassionate and caring
If you do not have the capacity to love yourself, then there is simply no basis on which to build a sense of caring toward others. Love for yourself does not mean that you are indebted to yourself. Rather, the capacity to love oneself or be kind to oneself should be based on a very fundamental fact of human existence: that we all have. A natural tendency to desire happiness and avoid suffering. Once this basis exists in relation to oneself, one can extend it to others.
Much of our misery, suffering, and pain really results from a self-centered attitude that cherishes one’s own well-being at the expense of others, whereas much of the joy, happiness, and sense of security in our lives arises from thoughts and emotions that cherish the well-being of others. Regard other’s well-being as precious as your own.
There is another fact concerning the cultivation of thoughts and emotions that cherish the well-being of others. It is your own self-interest and wishes are fulfilled as a by-product of actually working for other beings.
“The more you engage in activities and thoughts that are focused and directed toward the fulfillment of others’ well-being, the fulfillment or realization of your own aspiration will come as a by-product without having to make a separate effort.”
This means that if you love yourself, you feel compassion and care for others, you will harvest happiness and a better life. The reason is that your frequency of vibration will rise and the higher your frequency of vibration the better your life.
Some of you may have actually heard the remark, which his HH the 14th Dalai Lama makes quite often, that in some sense the compassionate practitioners of the Buddhist path are wisely selfish people, whereas people like yourself are the foolishly selfish.
If you think of yourself and disregard others, the result is that you always remain unhappy and have a miserable time. The time has come to think more wisely, hasn’t it? At some point the question comes up, “Can we really change our attitude?”
This is quite clear. The thing that we call “mind” is quite peculiar. Sometimes it is very stubborn and very difficult to change. But with continuous effort and with conviction based on reason, our minds are sometimes quite honest. When we really feel that there is some need to change, then our minds can change.
Wishing and praying alone will not transform your mind, but with conviction and reason. Reason based ultimately on your own experience, you can transform your mind. Time is quite an important factor here, and with time our mental attitudes can certainly change.
Love Yourself and Love Others as much and the gain will be yours!
From the Teachings of HH the 14th Dalai Lama with some little changes from me for better understanding of non-Buddhist people.
To read the correct text which is used on this page, go to Training the Mind by the Dalai Lama