Can We Read People‘s Minds

We explain or predict the behavior of others, mentalize and mind-read, theorize or stimulate, and understand gestures, intentions, and emotions, we watch what others do or pretend to do. We also explain or predict what other people believe, desire, or intend in the practice of their own minds.

How we communicate with others is important in our professional and private life and it is important to our success. If someone can communicate well with another person, he will be a good communicater in general and this will be of advantage in his career and in his professional life in general, and in his private life.

Understanding and predicting another person‘s behavior includes understanding the other person‘s thoughts and feelings. This means that you understand and be able to predict what is going on in an other person‘s mind. Everyone is capable of it. With practice one can improve his mind-reading skills.

This process can be unconscious and very often is. I think that these skills are not only approaches of mind-reading, but also rudiments of telepathic skills that we all unconsciously have and use.

We all have some mind-reading and telepathic skills.

Many people quickly respond to the mental state of another person. A person with a high self-esteem doesn‘t change his or her behavior no matter the mental state of the other person.

The neuroscientist Jean-Pierre Changeux (in Gallagher, see link below) has found that a person‘s relations to others depend on cognitive skills to understand mental states of others. These skills we begin to learn at an early age and continue to improve with the years.
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Can We Read An Other Person‘s Thoughts?

We all have the skill to read the other person‘s thoughts to a certain extent. We can interprete the behavior of others and predict their thoughts and feelings. A person who practices and uses these skills, is a mind-reader. This is an approach of telepathy and the ability of a telepathic conversation.

We all develop capacities which help us to understand others by their attitude or simulations.relative to the majority of their interactions. It is a set of processes that we use to relate to, interact with, or understand others. These are theoretical and simulation strategies. (Implicit versus explicit processes.) (Gallagher – see link at the end of the article).

Mind-reading is a prerequisite form of normal social interaction in everyday life.

People are mostly motivated by their beliefs and desires (Currie and Sterelny 2002 in Gallagher, see link below), which we shall understand when communicating with another person. Currie and Sterelny also Frith and Happè (1999 – in Gallagher) are of the opinion that mind-reading is a prerequisite form of normal social interaction in everyday life. We seem to await from other people a belief-desire psychology. My opinion is that most people are not enough focused on the other‘s face-expression, sound of their voice, and how they might be feeling and are therefore not able to read the mind of the other person. There are a few people who are aware of the possibilities to read the mind of others and observe carefully non-verbal signals. Some others are doing so unconsciously.

We interprete mental states from gestures, tone of voice, and actions of others. The mental state of someone that can be perceived by others, plays a role in social interactions.

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There are 3 main types when it comes to showing how one feels

• People who show their feelings clearly. Many people let go and show how they feel. They want that others see how they feel, so others take part in what is going on in their life and if things are not so good show compassion. This can be or if often repeated can become unpleasant for others.
• Some people do keep to themselves how they feel and do not so easily show their mental state. Though they are not really hiding their mental state, but they don‘t obviously show how they feel. After a short talk others can determine that they do not feel so good or that they feel a lot better as it looks at the first sight.
• People who intentionally and consciously hide how they feel. Only few people hide and are good in hiding how they feel. It makes it difficult to predict what they think, how they feel, and what their intentions are.

Observe other people and you will recognize these three types.Which of the 3 types of people do you belong to? Do you want that others immediately know how you feel, so they ask you and you tell them your story? Or is your face expression usually neutral and only if you meet a friend with whom you want to talk about what is going on in your life and maybe ask him for advice. Or are you intentionally hiding how you feel? Which of the 3 types of people do you want to belong? Watch yourself and practice how you want to appear to others.

To know another person well is to know that person for a long time and so you know that person‘s mind quite a bit. This means to know his or her beliefs, desires, and intentional states.
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Gaining Access To The Minds Of Others

The problem of gaining access to other minds, says Gallagher, is that the mind is conceived as an inner realm, in contrast to behavior, which is external and observable, and which gets its intentionality from the mental states that control it.

The mind is conceived as an inner realm, in contrast to behavior, which is external and observable,

We use our knowledge of another person‘s mind to explain or predict the other person‘s behavior. We have no direct access to another person‘s intentional state. We either postulate what their beliefs or desires are on the basis of a set of causal-explanatory laws or we project the results of certain simulation routines. One can, but must not get the right result.

During our childhood we make experiences of intentions of others. This knowledge becomes part of our subconscious mind. With the years we understand that we have beliefs and desires which results in a specific intentional state. We learn that also other people have specific beliefs and desires which we predict together with their intenrional states while talking with them and observing their gestures, their tone of voice, and movements of the body.

Some people can feel how others feel and can easily guess their thoughts, feelings, and intentions. These kind of people have a well-developed intuition. I guess that they also attentively observe the other person and see little changes in the face-expression. Furthermore, they are good listeners. They do not talk so much about themselves, but ask questions and participate in what the other person is telling them.
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The Important Points To Gain Excess Of The Other‘s Mind

• Observe the other person well. Look to their eyes directly, but not too long at a time. Watch their gestures of the face, their movements of hands and body, listen well to the tone of the voice and the tonation while the other speaks.
• Show compassion and adapt your face-expression a little to the other person‘s face-expression.
• Listen to what the other person says. Do not talk about yourself, but ask questions to find out more about what is going on in the other person‘s life and mind.
• Improve your Intuition. You can do that with the Intuition 3A Subliminal. Listen to a Subliminal once or twice a day for several weeks. A change of the programming of the subconscious mind need many repetitions.
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We Make Experiences Of The Behavior Of Others And Its Meaning

We must have experiences when we think of something specific to assign a certain feeling to it. Often we believe that others have the same feelings in certain situations as we do, which is often wrong.

We must have experiences when we think of something specific to assign a certain feeling to it. As we have no knowledge of other people‘s experiences and the assigning feelings, we can‘t know how they think and feel in certain situations. When we speak with others we can see from their face expression, hear from the tone of their voice, and the intonation how they feeling about a certain situation. In my opinion, many people predict the experiences of others based on their own experiences, which of course is often wrong. E.g. when one says to another: I know how you feel. The other often replies: How do you want to know how I am feeling?

We expect that a certain action or reaction has a certain meaning which is not always the case. There are people who are always smiling, giving the impression that they are doing fine and that they are okay with what the other person says and intends. But this is a certain communication tactic and not always the truth.

If someone lies often, he expects that the other person might also be lying. If someone is very direct, he expects that the other is also direct and are not prepared that the other is lying.

Some people look their conversation partner into his/her eyes. Others again and again take their gaze into other directions. From this kind of behavior one can predict if the other person has self-esteem problems, if he is not very much interested in the talk, or if he observes the scene and still listens to the talk. Ask questions and you will find out if the other person is listening. With a compassionate question, or a question about him, or a qeustion that is interesting, you might get his full attention.
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Each Person Has Made Other Experiences

Most people believe that another person feels the same way in a certain situation as they do, but this is not always the case. We all have grown up under different circomstances, have made different experiences throughout our lives, and we have other beliefs and desires. This is the case even if you believe to know the other person. There is one exception and this is if you know the person for a long time, know his or her stories, his or her beliefs and desires, and you know how this person reacts, thinks, and feels in certain situations.

Most people believe that another person feels the same way in a certain situation as they do, but this is not always the case.

But usually other people feel differently in one and the same situation as you do, because they have made other experiences than you do.

If you have been very happy while you heard a certain piece of music, you will feel good when you hear this piece of music again later in life. Another person might dislike it or be neutral. The same goes for certain foods. If you are very happy while you eat a certain food, you will enjoy eating this kind of food your life long. Another person might have had a bad experience and dislike the food. E.g., when my mother was in Sicilly during her honeymoon, she and my dad went to have lunch in a restaurant my mother disliked. Maybe there was something else which has made my mother unhappy. They had a dish with olive oil. The olive oil was not so good. Ever since my mother dislikes olive oil. She is absolutely unable to eat anything with olive oil and tells the story from more than 65 years ago. This is an example.

Other people have made other experiences to which they assign a certain feeling which comes up whenever they are in a same situation.

Since you do not know the experiences of others and not with what feelings they connect them, you can not know how the other person feels in a particular situation.
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When A Person Is Hiding His Feelings And His Intentions

If we do not know a person, which is the case if we meet that person the first time and in negotiations, we make predictions based on the knowledge of our own intentional states in a certain situation. It is a theoretical understanding of the other person.If a person hides his feelings under a smiling, thoughtful, or a blank face, one can get this person during the talk to finally express his feelings and intentions. If this is not the case, one has to observe gestures and body-movements very well. Sometimes it is gestures of hands and fingers that betray the feelings and intentions of that person. Body-reading is easier than mind-reading from the face. E.g., one can read intentions of a person from the direction into which the eyes are looking.

If someone hides his feelings, you might get this person with questions to express feelings and intentions.
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We All Follow Rules Of Conversation

We all follow certain rules of conversation. We are using a set of internal mental operations that come to be expressed, meaning externalized in speech, intonation, gestures, and actions. We all have a structure of experiences of others and predict the other person‘s thoughts and feelings which can be right or not.

The evaluative understanding about what someone means with what he says or about how you should respond in a particular situation characterizes most of our interactions. Our primary and usual way of communicating with others is a pragmatic interaction characterized by action, involvement, and interaction based on environmental and contextual factors, rather than mentalistic of conceptual contemplation (charaterized as explanation or prediction based on mental contents (Gallagher, see link below).

I share that opinion with Gallagher. In particular, in a conversation with a stranger, one can not predict his experiences, beliefs, desires, and intentions. One must rather remain with the objective facts which is what you perceive and hear.
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We Make Unconscious Conclusions Of Other‘s Behaviors

We unconsciously explain and predict an other person‘s thoughts, feelings, and behavior and make unconscious conclusions of causes.

What someone says is not a printout of the contents of his mind.

What someone says is not a printout of the contents of his mind. In decoding speech we go way beyond the words we hear, to hypothesize about the speaker‘s mental state. Though his mental state might have nothing to do with the content of the talk, which makes it almost impossible or at least difficult to predict his thoughts, feelings, and intentions from his words. It can be that his behavior is usually the same and does not show his mental state at all.

Neurons in the brain help us to translate our visual perception of another person‘s behavior into a mental plan of that behavior in ourselves, thus enabling an explanation or prediction of the other person‘s thoughts or actions. They rely on an internal representation of goals, emotions, body states and the like to map the same states in other individuals. (Gallagher, see link below). The result can be right or wrong.

In some cases the other person expresses his or her intentions in his/her actions. In these cases the beliefs and desires of the other person are directly expressed in the behavior or do not play a role.

Various movements of the head, the mouth, the hands, and body are perceived as meaningful and can be understood goal-directed. The movements of the other person can be mentalistic, the perception is non-mentalistic. The body-reading can be brought in connection with mind-reading. Watching expressive movements and gestures of another person, might be a sign that he does not intend to hide his mental state, his beliefs, desires, and intentions. Visual and auditory information specify the expression of emotions. The perception of emotion in the movement of others is a perception of an embodied comportment, rather than a theory or simulation of an emotional state. (Gallagher, see link below)

We are learning early to comprehend what another person intends to do. We sometimes understand the goal before the movements are completed. We are looking to the eyes, the facial gestures and body movements of the other person to be able to interpret or to discern his or her real intentions and following actions. This understanding is non-mentalistic.

Perceiving a person‘s gestures and body-movements, we can usually guess what their emotions and intentions are.

Observing a person‘s gestures and body-movements can tell how he or she is feeling and what intention he or she might have. However the emotion which someone is feeling, can have other reasons and might have no relation to the intention he is having at the time of the interaction. The person might not be fully conscious that he makes the impression to not be doing good. He might want to ask you a qeustion. If you talk to him and ask him a question, before he can say a word, he might change his intention asking you a question and the interaction takes another direction.
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As You Call In It Comes Back

How To Influence Others During An Interaction

Already at the beginning of a conversation you can change how the other person feels and his intentions. If you are friendly and express a good mood, accompanied by a friendly geeting and maybe a compliment, you can change the internal state of the other person. The other person might momentarily hide his feelings and intentions, but could change his plans.

Depending on the reason of the interaction you might better not change the mood of the other person and appear neutral. You then can observe the other person‘s behavior better.

You can lead the talk into a certain direction from the beginning or change the topic the other person is talking about. If a person is criticizing something or someone what you dislike, talking about a bad occurance what you don‘t want to hear, or the like, you might want to change the subject. There are people who constantly speak about something negative. If possible you should go out of their way.

I usually manage to make someone who is obviously not in a good mood and defensive, quickly friendly and helpful. I do not respond to the bad mood of the person, but keep my friendly smiling face and speak friendly and happy.

But their are people who are constantly in a negative mood and do not stop nagging. If I can I go out of the way of these kind of people or make the talk short.

If someone gets angry with me because I did whatever was wrong or was misunderstood, I apologize very kindly, even though I would like to tell this person my opinion about his behavior. This way the interaction ends well. You never know what it is good for. Therefore always finish a conversation positively.

When I meet someone, I let him first ask me how I am. This way I can quickly say that I am good and ask him how he or she is doing. I then can immediately ask questions and watch the other person.

With good conversation skills you can make lots of good friends and helpful connections.

Observe how others react to you. Improve your behavior, your gestures, your body-movements, your voice and intonation, and the content of the talk. With better conversation skills you can make lots of good friends, get others to help and support you.
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How To Learn Mind-Reading And Having Better Conversations

We predict the behavior of others, mentalize, mind-read, or theorize, and understand gestures, intentions, and emotions. We watch what others do or pretend to do. We also predict what other people believe, desire, or intend in the practice of their own minds. You can practice all that can make a conversation better.

• You can learn a lot about a person by oberserving him well. Be more attentive to other people‘s behavior, their eyes, mouth, gestures, body-movements, expecially the movements of their hands, their voice and intonation.
• If you want to get to know the other person better, do not intend to change his mood or the topic he starts to talk about.

While talking with another person, give him or her time to say what he/she wants to say. Do not make too early conclusions, rather observe his/her behavior, movement of eyes, the gestures, tone of voice, and intonation, movement of hands and body.
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These Are Skills You Have To Practice If You Want To Be A Better Mind-Reader

1. Be focused and be present in the moment. Do not think of yourself or your intentions.
2. Become aware of the person‘s facial features, his or her body, how he or she is dressed, the makeup if it is a female, the hair-cut. All this is telling you something about this person. Also where you meet this person, because also the surrounding can tell you something about this person.
3. Be a good listener. Also be aware of what this person is saying and what he/she is not saying, what you hear between their words. Process what they are saying, before you respond.
4. During the conversation observe their gaze, their facial-expression, their gestures, body-movements, tone of voice and tonation changes depending of the topic and what you say.
5. If you are certain that the other person feels good in your presence, you can ask if he or she feels the same way as you do and you explain how you are feeling. Continue to oberserve the behavior of the other person.
6. Further in the talk you can ask what his/her intentions are and you can find out more about the life of this person.
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Skills That Are Helpful To Be A Good Mind-Reader

Skills that are helpfull to be a good mind-reader are

1. to be a good listener,
2. to be a good observer,
3. having a well developed Intuition,
4. to be able to be highly focused,
5. to be innerly calm,
6. to be patient,
7. to be friendly and positive without influencing the other,
8. having knowledge about body-reading. (Amazon Affiliate Link)

When you try to read other people‘s minds, clear your mind from your thoughts to fully focus on the other person, and be patient.

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Book: How to Read Minds and Inflluence People (Amazon Affiliate Link)

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After I have read the article of Gallagher, I wanted to write this article, in which I use a few sentences from Gallagher’s articles: The Interactive Practice of Mind by the scientist Gallagher written 2005
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